Lonely Path

I know it has been a long time since I sat down and spewed my thoughts across the web, but for the last eight months of my life, I have been nuts deep in love. There is nothing I hate worse, than reading a bunch of crap about other people’s love problems, and with that in mind I will keep this short and sweet. A week ago today, I received an email that effected my life dramatically. Gerlinde, my girlfriend at the time, sent me the ole “don’t ever call or email me again, because I want my life to be normal” email. She had become one of my best friends, from whom I sought advice and criticism, and shared love. If normality is what she desires, then it can only stand to reason that I should not be in her life. This was the first out of many relationships that ended, not due to an extreme lack of judgment on my part. Everyone must follow their own path and it seems that once again I am walking alone. The last eight months were the best of my life, and my dear friend will be eternally missed.

Thanksgiving auch ja!

Where to begin? I hope you had a great Thanksgiving, cos I sure did. I did not get to take any pics of my finished bird or stuffing because it was rather crazy at that point trying to get to the Mensa on time and with the bird and stuffing still hot. Graham and I took a taxi and placed our bird with the others that were waiting to be devoured. The table for our fest was beautiful. I had the best stufing there! Also the bird was not too bad. Before the pies were dished out, I went outside and had a beer. The best thing was that the snow kept it cold. After that we went back inside and took too many pictures. Coffee was then dished out like candy, but those with no mind for coffee kept to the wine and beer. It was really funny because the name of the wine is GROSS. Lost in translation, but still not the best wine I have ever had. After dinner we walked to one of our favorite bars called Casion. You can play pool there, but I was more for minggleing and taking pictures. This crazy guy gave Erin his number and well it is better to have tried than nothing at all. I made friends with the bartender named Martin and he kept giving us free shots. Was a great time until some girl passed out and they called an amblance. Then I puked and sortly there after Erin and I grabbed a taxi back home. She made some kind of rasin stuffing and it was really good. We toasted a great Thanksgiving with some Absinth that she had. All in all it was agreat time. How was your Thanksgiving?

Verständnis

The never ending stream of words I do not know, shall never seem to be an end within me. So I thumb through the pages looking for clarity, but am never able to fulfill the vast vagueness that clouds and crowds my daily strife. The words bring power, which is not without satisfaction, and satisfaction yields far greater emotions, however entangled they may be with moral conundrums. Finding reason seems to be as futile as searching for center, or perhaps they are just one in the same. Never being able to understand one another is the darkest cosmic joke, or better yet punishment handed down from nature whom could only be tired of the perpetual rape of it’s resources. And with every finite breath I take, I can not help but feel gratitude that my mind has not yet begun to consciously count them down. Could trust only have formed by happenstance? Every word needs an antonym. Cosmetic complements, which conceal jealousy and fear, give the air with which they are spoken the same consistency of a muddy riverbank.

Calf rope and whiffle dust

Thirteen years….do you remember what happened thirteen years ago? Lets see we got: President Clinton elected, LA Riots, Bosnia and Herzegovina Secede from Yugoslavia, largest shopping mall in the US is constructed, Nicoderm, first nicotine transdermal patch, John Gotti is convicted, hurricane Andrew hits Florida, Johnny Carson leaves the Tonight Show, Amy Fisher pleads guilty, Mike Tyson is found guilty of rape, the first black female astronaut, and it was the first year I celebrated the death and birthday of my father in the same year. His death did not make any nations news or any historical timelines, but for me it will always remain a landmark in time. Today is yours Dad, and rest assured I will never forget you. I love and miss you, and hope you have a great birthday today!

Some my say that I'm a dreamer...

I woke up this morning, well maybe it was the afternoon, and reflected on my dreams. From what I can remember of this one, wow! This dream was a one of a kind. I dreamed, that when you are dreaming, you are actually “downloading” all of your thoughts and actions for your next day into your brain. It was one of my best dreams, yet at the same time scariest. Seriously, think about the implications of this, if this idea could be proven. “Reality” is nothing more than your senses and the ability to recall events, and not even in a chronological order. Would you think that I was crazy, if I said that the things we do in our daily lives has an effect on our dreams? Of course you wouldn’t because, it feels like we are drawing bits and pieces from our daily lives into our subconscious dreams. So why could it not be the other way around?

Love me or hate me! At least I am me.

No one knows retarded better than me, with the one exception being my best friend Lile. Today, was just about on par for me. I woke up this morning with more or less fragmented memories of the night before, and the distinct memory of putting a pizza in the oven. However, I had no recollection of ever eating it. As I made my way into my kitchen that is shared with 5 other people, whom are equally attached to our oven, there it lay in all of its charred glory. This is truly not the worst mistake I have ever made in my 25 years on this earth, but what really puts the “re” with “tard” here, is that this is the second time this month that this has happened. I have decided that tomorrow I am going to buy food that requires no further preparation other than open and consume.

Damn right Mr. Twain!

Mark Twain wrote a hilarious passage about the difficulties and absurdities (to an englishspeaking mind) of the German language.

... A few remarks about one of the most curious and notable features of my subject--the length of German words. Some German words are so long that they have a perspective. Observe these examples:
Freundschaftsbezeigungen.
Dilettantenaufdringlichkeiten.
Stadtverordnetenversammlungen.
These things are not words, they are alphabetical processions. And they are not rare; one can open a German newspaper at any time and see them marching majestically across the page--and if he has any imagination he can see the banners and hear the music, too. They impart a martial thrill to the meekest subject. I take a great interest in these curiosities. Whenever I come across a good one, I stuff it and put it in my museum. In this way I have made quite a valuable collection. When I get duplicates, I exchange with other collectors, and thus increase the variety of my stock. Here rare some specimens which I lately bought at an auction sale of the effects of a bankrupt bric-a-brac hunter:
Generalstaatsverordnetenversammlungen.
Alterthumswissenschaften.
Kinderbewahrungsanstalten.
Wiedererstellungbestrebungen.
Of course when one of these grand mountain ranges goes stretching across the printed page, it adorns and ennobles that literary landscape--but at the same time it is a great distress to the new student, for it blocks up his way; he cannot crawl under it, or climb over it, or tunnel through it.